In a recent issue of InsideMS, the magazine of the The National MS Society, they had an article on animal assisants; dogs specifically. It reminded me of how I’ve been thinking that it would be cool to have a service monkey. I would name him “Pestilence”. He could sit on my shoulder and fling poo at people who annoy me. That would be perfect for movie theaters.

“That ain’t popcorn, lady. Now shutup.”

I think I need to get out more.

I’ve often wished that I could have gone through something like SEAL training in the past. Making it through something like that must give you a real confidence boost. I imagine that all of life’s problems take on a new perspective.

Panicked co-worker - “Oh no! We’ve got to get this TPS report finished by five!”
SEAL - “I once killed a shark with my toenail clippings.”

I guess I have something similar now, only it seems a lot more like just not giving a shit.